So tomorrow is my school's Battle of the Bands. My band happens to dress up as pirates, which has led us to believe that if we do win, it will probably be more because of the fact that we are dressed like idiots rather than musical abilities. O well, I call it strategy. So last Saturday we went shopping for pirate costumes. Of course we're all too cheap to go to a rental shop and buy the stuff that actual pirates would have worn so instead we went to the ultimate back up, Good Will.
We began searching through shirt after shirt and pant after pant trying to find something that looked something like a pirate would've worn but despite our efforts, we couldn't find a thing. Finally we looked for help and found an employee named Stephanie that we enlisted into our quest. She spotted the problem immediately and led us away from t
he men's section into the women's section. Sure enough, almost all of our costumes are women's clothing. Its not too bad cuz no one knows, but I don't feel I fill the shirt very well.
This lead me to two conclusions:
1) Pirates were crossdressers.
2) Girls dress in some weird things.
I'm not sure which is correct but either way, someone should feel a little offended.
There is one man however that I cannot stop thinking of as a Pirate. Michael Jackson, Picture shown below:
Alright to get the full effect you've g
otta copy
that picture,
set it as your background and start playing 'Thriller'.
Michael Jackson would be the best pirate ever! Look at him he's dancing! He's killing his captain while dancing. He'd be unstoppable. Other pirates would fire at him and he'd just moonwalk past all of their bullets. They'd all be like, "Arg, I be thinkin he be movin forward but he be not!"
So before you think I'm crazy, tell me who you would perfer:
Normal Michael Jackson (Convicted rapist)?
Or the DREAD CAPTAIN JACKSON (where rape is acceptable)?
I find the desicion easy. GO PIRATE MICHAEL JACKSON!
